Muahahaha, YES! We did it! We defeated that fascist racist Islamophobe, the far-right and dangerous Le Pen! The French Trump, or Trumpette. We proved that big media censorship and good ol’ propaganda still works, and thankfully we were able to prevent Russian hacking this time!
Yes I was wrong. I thought she would wi–
HAHA! Yes say it again! You were wrong! Proving that you are wrong about everything!
I already admitted I was wro–
Wait, wait, let me set up the camera so I can share this on my Tumblr blog and YouTube channel.
*CaliLiberal sets up a camera pointing at CaliConservative*
OK, and action!
This is CaliConservative, and I truly thought Marine Le-Pen would win the French–
Wait, hold on, got bad audio and that 800W open faced lighting is a little bit off, I knew I should have went with the 2000W one.
Elizabeth can you get a little bit of makeup under CaliCons eyes, it looks like he hasn’t slept in weeks. NOW!
*A frightened make-up girl starts hurriedly applying makeup under CaliConservatives eyes*
What the…when did you get money to hire a makeup girl? You were just on welfare last week!
Well I do have student debt piling up from my quadruple major at Berkeley and I did take out a pretty big loan on my credit card to rent out all this video equipment.
You could just stop spending all that money on unnecessary stuff and you wouldn’t need welfare!
Hush CaliCon, don’t change the subject. Damn it Elizabeth! He still looks like total complete garbage, oh well. ACTION!
Hi, I am CaliConservative, and I was completely wrong on the French election. I truly and deeply felt that Marine Le-Pen would win. All of the same media and pollsters that said Trump would lose, also said Le-Pen would lose. Now granted, at the time, Francois Fillon was more of a contend–
CUT! OK I can edit out the last part. You were starting to elaborate way too much there and I wouldn’t be able to edit any of that out of context so its unusable.
What? Don’t you want your audience to get the context of the situation and to find out why I am saying what I am saying?
Hahahah! Oh you’re serious? Well I can’t do that. You see my audience relies heavily on only getting very specific information, that I control, that one very specific reaction from you, which again I totally control.
I take that and viola! I have a perfect information mortar round to fire directly into my audience. They hear the narrative that I want, and they see the reaction from you that I control.
That’s sick! You don’t care that France will most likely have an uptick in terrorism?
You don’t care that the French economy can suffer from taking in all these refugees?
You truly don’t care if people get killed as a result of terrorism?
Are White people doing the terrorism?
No, it’s mostly coming from Muslim refugees.
From Toulouse to Paris, from Nice to Normandy, terrorist attacks are happening all over France. Not electing Le Pen will make the situation worse! Macron is not good for France–
Lies! Everybody knows Islam is the religion of peace. We must be completely willing to take in any and all refugees, especially those of the Islamic faith.
Any terrorist attacks are either government posing as Islam or in response to “Western neo-Imperialism” or insulting the prophet muhammad, peace be upon him.
And why would electing Macron be worse? Because he isn’t a racist right-wing xenophobe like Le Pen?! They will be far better off under Macron and Islam! Islam is the religion of peace after all!
I completely disagree. People are rioting in the streets of France every other day! Parts of the country look nothing like what they used to. The Eiffel Tower has to have extra protections and walls being built around it to protect it from these Islamic attacks now.
Hell it has become far more dangerous because the radical Islamist’s have recently proven they don’t need complicated explosives to inflict devastating casualties anymore. A stolen truck can inflict heavy losses on unsuspecting victims.
The Islamic threat has evolved and instead of responding to that new development the people of France have chosen to embrace the threat. This will not end well.
I think the sudden importation of Islamic immigrants into France without a proper assimilation process happening is obviously the main cause of the problem. Marine Le-Pen knew that, Nigel Farage knows that, Donald Trump knows that, the people that voted for Brexit know it.
I am thankful we have Donald J Trump as our President. I am thankful that the people of Britain and America have voted to regain their independence. It’s unfortunate France couldn’t join the list. It seems individuality has become a dirty word in this new global economy we live in because of the Liberals the preach open-arms “tolerant” approach.
Except of course no one practices the same open-arms policy in countries that actually fight back against unrestricted multiculturalism. Try suddenly interjecting hundreds of thousands of white people into the Middle East. Unwilling to assimilate and spreading western culture all over the Middle East. You wouldn’t be able to count the amount of decapitated infidels.
Try sending hundreds of thousands of Latin people into China, speaking Spanish and unwilling to assimilate to Chinese culture. The Chinese prisons would suddenly have a massive influx of prisoners. Of course it wouldn’t last long because they practice the death penalty there without hesitation.
LIES! Thank Gaia we won the French Election! Thank Macron! He is the French version of Hillary Clinton and it is important that we stand against Trump supporters! Macron knew how to say what people wanted to hear, not what they supposedly needed to hear.
Le-Pen was too scary! Telling us how bad everything is, I don’t want to hear that! I want to hear how great everything is and France will be totally fine under Macron, just watch CaliConservative.
The European Union is a beautiful thing and a great step towards a new world order that embraces tolerance.
I am telling you CaliLiberal, France will become far worse. You will see. The European Union overrides the sovereignty and doesn’t allow the citizens of a nation to have control over it’s own borders.
Unfortunately, I think we will all see that this will become a disaster. I am very sad that I was wrong about her winning the election.
I guess I just thought the French people wouldn’t allow their beautiful historic country to fall to the new Islamic caliphate, but unfortunately the loss of Le-Pen was a dark day for freedom.
OK I have heard enough. That’s a wrap everyone, let’s go home.
*The film crew begins packing everything up. CaliLiberal scoffs and walks away*