Oh you fascist Nazi Republican, CaliConservative, you have seriously done it this time! I should call the police and report you for hate speech! And if I didn’t hate all the racist cops, I would. It’s me, of course everyone’s favorite delta cuck(and totally proud of it!), my name is CaliLiberal.
Great, what did I do to deserve yet another visit from you? And is this gonna be a regular thing? Because if so I will just save time and turn on the new Amy Shumer special and die from not-laughing. Also can you please wipe your shoes before constantly barging in here, they are filthy!
I am not wearing shoes, those are what my actual feet look like. I don’t wear shoes because they are being made by slave children in Indonesia! In fact that reminds me to tweet my followers from my smart phone about this clothes made by slave labor epidemic.
OK first of all, gross. Second you know your phone was made by those very same sla….never mind, not worth it. Please get your utopian marxist ideas and your disgusting feet off my property immediately. I don’t have time for your shenanigans today we just won a major victory in Georgia.
That is exactly why I am here! You wingnuts and Trump were able to stop our guy Jon Ossoff from getting elected! Do you know how much money we spent? How many high production value attack ads we ran? We spent millions of dollars that could have went to us buying more vacation homes in Martha’s Vineya–I mean, money that could have went to homeless people.
I don’t get it, we checked off all the boxes. Telling people Jon Ossoff is against fascist Trump? Check. Blatantly pandering to ethnic minorities, LGBTQ+, Islam and illegals? Check. Spending millions on prime time TV ads? Check. Making sure we had a guy that looks a little cucky? Check.
Stealing some voting machines out the back of a truck? Chec…wait, no, ummmm, we didn’t do that, ahem*clears throat* we never do election fraud.
Uhh, OK, that was weird. First, I didn’t even vote in the Georgia election, funnily enough neither did Jon Ossoff, because he doesn’t even live in the district he wants to represent. Second, those reasons you listed for wanting to get him elected are the reason why he won’t be elected! People are sick and tired of your Liberal Progressive crapola.
Look here you wingnut! The people love us, the real people, the ones that want our promise of socialist utopia! All of those other people are just uneducated dumb conservatives that don’t know what is good for them! Thank Gaia they have us Liberal Progressives to show them the way! Besides, we already got 48% of the district, don’t need much more, easy win.
Face it, you guys needed to win outright, otherwise the runoff election is gonna be brutal for your boy. This is his first campaign, and he blew a major opportunity. Now he has to face what I think will be a grueling road to the June 20th election in his first bid for political office. However, you are right, we didn’t win the election, but we won time and the voters also sent a strong message to the Republican establishment that they are unhappy.
Haha, where did you hear that FOX news? I bet you the Russians and Putin probably had something to do with this, but I am not worried at all, we will spend more money! We will double down on identity politics! We will harden our stance against the fascist cheeto Trump! We will plaster Ossoff all over TV and carefully cultivate the exact perfect personality we want to sell!
Well if you aren’t worried than why did you barge in here with your disgusting feet and misguided political ideology?
Because, I just wanted to tell you that we are still better than you and don’t get your hopes up, the Liberal Progressives are going to destroy your precious America and your very way of life, methodically, slowly, precisely, surgically removing one district at a time!
Also, mainly I was wondering if I could borrow $20 and some food? My parents are making me pay for my education in Journalism can you believe that!? I swear if they start asking me to pay rent I will run away forever!
You’re what, 45? How long have you been in school?
Hey it takes a long time to quadruple major! Also I was thinking of continuing my education by getting another major in Child Welfare so I can gain authority over other peoples kids.
Even though I would never have any kids of my own, first because I would never bring a kid into this horrible world, and second because there are too many people here already!
Ok this has gone on too long, get the hell out I am serious.
*CaliCon grabs CaliLib. Due to his vegan diet, CaliLib is weak and effortlessly picked up. CaliCon tosses him outside*
So I will keep this short and sweet here, it’s late. I am tired, I actually work most of the time, otherwise I would write all day, but I live in the real world where I have to work 8+ hours a day to make sure my obligations as a man, i.e. taking care of my woman and paying the rent, are done dutifully.
This was a huge win for the Republicans make no mistake about it. This guy Ossoff was a bit of a threat, he’s exactly the kind of candidate the Dems usually win with. A guy with an unknown background and a smooth tongue. A guy that is aware of the power of the social justice message over the easily impressionable.
Georgia took a stand against the Progressive Liberals tonight. Granted this district is highly Conservative, and many voters stayed home and voted around the bill to send a message to the GOP elite. What was the message? They are tired of electing people that say one thing and do another. So much so they they threaten to vote heavily for a Democrat.
Still the election very fierce and extremely competitive, it even looked for a second like the Cuckback Kid Ossoff might pull it off, but alas the Super Liberal Democrat missed his victory by only 2% of the vote.
Now as I said earlier, this isn’t a complete win, we still gotta win in June in the runoff election, but I will predict now that Ossoff will lose that election. Handily. This is a heavily conservative area, most of the voters stayed home. They toyed with Ossoff, but they had their fun, on June 20th, the GOP will show massive strength, but expect a vicious fight.
This local election will become a national election, it will be heavily covered and bitterly contested. Expect this one to get worse before it gets better. The Dems will bus in people from all across the country for this one, get ready!